What We Get Wrong About Adulthood

The Trap of Time

Erik P.M. Vermeulen, PhD
5 min readSep 27, 2024

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Photo courtesy of author

Sometimes, the smallest events unexpectedly open our eyes, making us see the world differently and wish we had acted differently.

When I was ten years old, I didn’t have this feeling of drift. Everything seemed clear, and life felt certain.

I was fascinated by science and everything related to it.

I loved nature and animals. We had cats and dogs at home, and at one point, I had nine large, tropical fish tanks in my bedroom.

I would sit there for hours, observing everything in these tiny, flourishing ecosystems — the vivid colors, the darting movements, the courtship and mating rituals, and other behaviors. Tiny worlds I hadn’t exactly created but which I curated and was responsible for looking after. A series of infinitely complex stories played out right before my eyes.

Every fish had a name and an invented back story. Zeus — the a-typical alpha male discus fish — seeking to impose his will on the others in “his” fish tank. Aphrodite, timid and anxiously hiding, except for feeding time when hunger-fueled bravery motivated her to come out from her hiding place behind some rocks.

The lives of these fish — their unfolding adventures — mesmerized me and were a source of endless fascination.

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